


Things Peridot is No Longer Allowed To Do

by Doc_Cairo



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Gen, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Humor, Noodle Incidents, Rules
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-06
Updated: 2019-06-06
Packaged: 2020-04-11 12:30:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19109707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Doc_Cairo/pseuds/Doc_Cairo
Summary: Peri-mischief of the highest order.Based loosely on "Skippy's List", "Things Dr. Bright Can't Do", and other similar lists.





	Things Peridot is No Longer Allowed To Do

Due to a number of incidents, the following are prohibited.

1\. Peridot is not allowed on 4chan.

  * Peridot is not allowed on 8chan.
  * Peridot is not allowed on @channel.
  * Peridot is not allowed to use ANY imageboard type forum.



2.  No abducting cows to prank humans.

3.  Not allowed to attend fandom conventions without a responsible chaperone.

  * Amethyst does not count as a RESPONSIBLE chaperone.
  * Not Lapis either.
  * Nor Bismuth.



4\. Not allowed to run for public office.

  * Not allowed to hack voting results in an election for public office.



5\. Not to enhance human automobiles for the purposes of illegal street racing.

6\. Not allowed to make "your mama" jokes in the presence of  ~~Steven~~ ;  ~~humans~~ ; ANYONE.

7.  If Peridot acquires a gem artefact capable of mind control, she should hand it over to Garnet, not use it to turn herself into the "leader of the crystal gems".

  * Taking said artefact to Vegas is right out.
  * Or D.C. (Unless it's an emergency. Pearl will judge when it's an emergency.)



8.  Not allowed to claim she is from an alternate timeline unless she is ACTUALLY from another timeline.

  * Not allowed to research or interact with any form of time travel.



9\. Banned from the state of Missouri.

10\. Not allowed to make jokes about the planet Uranus.

11\. "My evil twin did it." Is not an excuse.

12.  Not allowed to dress as a ghost for Halloween.

13\. Not allowed to "crash" the science fair at Connie's high school.

14.  Not allowed to force anyone to view the "Camp Pining Hearts Holiday Special".

15.  Peridot may not add items to this list herself, farcical or not.

  * Not allowed to suggest items to be added, in order to circumvent their specific wording later.



16.  Not allowed to sell items enhanced with gem tech on Etsy.

17.  Not allowed to upload viral videos of Amethyst eating non-foods.

18\. Not allowed to enter Pumpkin in  ~~dog shows~~ ;  ~~toddler beauty pageants~~ ; any competition.

19\. Not allowed to put "Kick Me" signs on Jasper.

20\. This list is not exhaustive and may be expanded given any future incidents.

  * That is not a challenge Peridot!




End file.
